Hello, come along with me as I fight the battle of my life, addiction. Daily I will be writing about how things are going as I attempt to deal with life without drugs. Pretty freaking scary for me to type that much less do it. I have been abusing opiates and benzos in one form or another for about twenty years. It would be amazing not to have this monster following me at every turn. That is what made me decide to give sobriety a shot.
If you have been through this before I would love to get your feedback and hope I can inspire someone to get help too. Heroin is killing us so fast. The overdose rate has surpassed car wrecks for leading cause of accidental death. That is huge, they say it is an epidemic and I believe them.
There are different kinds of addicts but we are all the same when you get down to it. I am a “functioning” addict. To the outside world, I am a great mother, daughter, and wife. Let’s hope that I am. The question is can you be a great mother if you take suboxone every morning and Xanax when your nerves are screaming? Hopefully, we will find the answers to some of these.
A few days ago I made an appointment for treatment for sexual abuse. The abuse happened when I was a child. I didn’t get any therapy after and I have always believed that the abuse had a major role in my choices as a young adult. Before I began using drugs I began working as an escort in Louisville, KY. No drugs just wanted to make money. We will be addressing the ten years I spent visiting hotel rooms as my only employment and the effects of that.
I hope to make you see that addiction can happen to anyone. We all deserve understanding and support. Whether you believe it is a disease or a moral failing I invite you to come on this journey with me. We will laugh, cry and with little, luck I will get myself clean and help a few others along the way.